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Hyperboles I'm tired of

Friday, July 18, 2014

"I have the best mom/dad/husband/whatever in the world."
Ok he/she is probably really great and you may even believe she's "the best mom you could ask for (thank goodness we don't get to pick em), but let's not forget there are lots of awesome moms and it's just utterly impossible to judge, so don't even try. 

"I'd only be half the person I could be without him/her."
Well that sucks. Hopefully they don't break up with you or die. 

"I love ____ with all my heart."
Sucks for everyone else in your life to realize there's no room for them in your heart. 

"We need more chivalry in our society." 
So maybe this isn't as much of a hyperbole as it is just a stupid phrase I'm tired of. So maybe dudes don't hold the car door for you anymore (which is totally doable for your independent self), but you're also not just a trophy wife that can't even work and is just expected to pop out babies and make sandwiches). Ya win some, ya lose some. I'll take a little extra arm effort over being property. 

"Only in ______," when referring to one's hometown in which something redneck, crazy, or skeezy happened. That shit happens everywhere. Don't try to put the spotlight on yourself even for a bad thing, to try to make yourself feel different. If I went to my Social Psych class I'd probably know the official term for that kind of attention seeking behavior. 

"I can't function without coffee." Now I'm all about some coffee, but I'm convinced the energy aspect is 75% a placebo. 

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