My Makeup Bag... Sarcasm Included

I've often seen bloggers share what's in their makeup bags to help their envious readers get their flawless look. At least then, maybe we can feel a little closer to having the seemingly perfect lives of our cyber crushes. 

So in case you're all wondering how I get this flawless look of natural beauty, here's all my very new, expensive, secret tips. 

Here, you see my awesome liquid Revlon eyeliner that actually is awesome. Thanks Lauren Elizabeth for sharing this wonder. 

Then you've got my like 5+ years old Almay powder I nabbed from my Ocala Home when I ran out of my other powder. Forget replacing them with new, good ones... I'll go with the one that was abandoned and unused for years for a reason. The cracked case and powder plus the ripped applicator(?) just add that much more character. You'd think this picture would've been the last memory of that powder before it hit the trash, but no. It went right back in that bag. My little Almay Trooper. 

My Merle Norman foundation was actually awesome too... But was purchased for my brother's wedding... My senior year of high school. This was another find on an Ocala bathroom raid. 

Lastly, my trusty Cover Girl mascara. I'm not so sure it even makes my eyelashes any darker any more, but I brush it on anyways, making me feel like I'm accenting the eyeballs and doing a good job at being a girl. Sometimes. 

Now don't even think about spending time in front of the mirror applying these products. They have to be done in the car (at stop lights of course) to get the incredible results you see on this here lady.